This was it... the last final week + weekend of CSOS... I'm really a mix of emotions, not gonna lie. CSOS has been a blast, and I really don't want it to end. I wanna continue spending time with these incredible people and working my job which I really enjoy, but I guess all good things must come to an end... Also, I guess I do feel like I need a break as well, but I wish that was all it was. A little homestay then back to the grind. Unfortunately, it doesn't work like that. I'll be really interested to see how our relationships with each other evolve over the school year, and I'm curious to see how my role at CEF will change. I was offered a leadership position as Tech Coordinator and I'm really excited about that! I basically work on helping populations without steady access to the internet/web/computers gain access. I've already got a couple ideas relating to nonprofits in the area that work in that field, but I'm excited to explore that goal! I'm tempted to also stay on the Housing Team but I wanna just try Tech Coordinator first and make sure it's not too much of a time commitment.
On Monday, in the office, I only had one meeting with a member I really like, so that was a fun day. Unfortunately, I had to tell him we'd no longer be working together due to the end of CSOS (sad) so that continues the sad trend of things being over.
Tuesday, was extremely similar. I had two member meetings, both of which with members I'd developed a great relationship with, so telling them I was gonna be gone sucked. The one upside to all of this is I always get to tell them I'm coming back in the Fall. To be honest, the timing also couldn't be any better because CEF is moving offices and will be closed August 14 - September 1, so by the time I'm settled in at school, I'll be able to get right to it and I won't have missed that many member meetings.
Wednesday was very interesting because I don't usually have member meetings on Wednesday, but this particular one I voluntarily came back in to meet with a member who I'd been having a difficult time with recently. The same one I talked about in last week's blog that had me in a tough position. I just really wanted to sort out his business before I left to Egypt. He technically came in on Monday as well, but he was 40 minutes late so we couldn't really do anything. This time he kept on insisting on the $200 Chapel Request, but we were hesitant. I got on the line with his landlord again and this time he confirmed the Member was getting locked out today. I pleaded with him for a while to let the member stay for 2 or 3 more days while the Chapel processed his request, but the landlord eventually hung up on me. I fulfilled the Chapel Request in a fashion that was both totally honest to the Member's complicated situation while still arguing on his behalf to get the money, but at the end of the meeting, I had to tell the Member there was nothing more I could do for him which was extremely difficult. In fact, not only did I tell him there was nothing more I could do for him, the one thing I could do was get him the address to the Durham Rescue Mission because he had nowhere to stay. I'd never seen anybody so look so defeated in front of me, and while I knew I wasn't at fault, I couldn't help but feel useless and inadequate for not being able to fix his situation. That was the first time I ended up crying at my job this summer.
Thursday, I met with a member I'd been meeting with for 7 weeks now to tell him I couldn't meet with him again: a recurring theme for this and next week. My other member was an old lady who needed her life insurance processed, so that was an easier meeting.
Friday was Seeds!!!!!!!!! I'm really happy with how the event turned out to be honest. I honestly didn't expect the turnout we got and I was honestly really happy serving food and dancing with all the kids. Although I had my doubts, the event was really great in my opinion.
On the weekend, we went to the Food Truck rodeo which I had no idea about but it ended up being really cool! I can't wait to go to things like that and the Farmers Market during the school year. I definitely feel really integrated into the Durham community and can't wait to try and spread that to my friends and other Duke students!
Here goes to the final week of CSOS... Thank you for everything, Dielle!!!!
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